James and I were married by the Justice of the Peace in McKinney, TX on July 23, 2019. Originally we planned to have an actual wedding at Acres Away (our property in the country), but honestly, my anxiety couldn’t handle it.
We’ve talked about getting married for years (and years), but there was always something that made it feel like it wasn’t a great time. We considered getting married when we were in Portland visiting his aunt and uncle and my sister, but would our families feel left out? What about our friends? We almost got married when we went to Italy, but the amount of paperwork and hoops was enough to leave me in bed worrying for days. We decided we would do it at Acres Away, but I felt like I would have to do x, y, and z before the wedding or regret it forever.
Then, while talking to my sister in Bloomington, I realized that the reason we weren’t getting married was that I was too worried about everyone else. So, I decided then and there that we were just going to do it. And I wasn’t going to tell anyone.
A couple days after this epiphany, James joined me in Bloomington to visit the Greywolfs (my sister’s family). On the drive home from the airport, I told him I was finally ready to get married and that I wanted to do it on our nine and a half year anniversary because I like the 23rd. After verifying that this is really what I wanted, he agreed.
So we did it.
I made an appointment with the Justice of the Peace, bought a dress, tried to alter it myself, failed, and bought another dress off the rack two days before the wedding. I made up a reason to borrow my great-grandmother’s necklace from my mom; the same necklace that my mom wore on her wedding day.
We chose James’ outfit and had it cleaned. I begged a photographer at 8pm the night before our wedding to do our pictures. The day of, I did my own hair and makeup, and I picked up flowers at a neighborhood florist on the way to the courthouse.
We got married in a sweet and thoughtful ceremony, had pie in Downtown McKinney, and then drove to Royse City where we had the best barbecue in the area (as stated by me and Texas Monthly). And yes, I ate brisket from a trailer in my wedding dress at a wooden picnic table in a parking lot. And yes, I did get barbecue sauce on my dress.
Then we came home to our house and drank sangria in our pool and enjoyed the gorgeous mid-80s weather. We couldn’t have asked for a more perfect wedding day for us.
It was so difficult for us to keep it a secret. As someone who talks to my mom practically daily, and my sister and best friend at least once a week, I had to make decisions myself. It turns out that I am capable of this; I like to get everyone’s opinion, but I don’t have to. I hope that all of you know how important you are to us and how much we love you. Choosing to get married with just the two of us was right for us, but without all of you in our lives, we wouldn’t be here today. We love you so much, and we are looking forward to celebrating with you when we see you next.